How Remembering Can Improve Your Marriage

 
I was recently thinking about one of the best dates my wife and I have had. We recreated  our very first date…
We went to the same Mexican restaurant…then we went to the outdoor amphitheatre where we saw Dave Matthews Band play.
I do have to give my wife credit. There was NO concert on the night we went back to the theatre. She had to get permission from the security guards for us to have strawberries and chocolate and champagne on the hillside looking at the stage.
That was great.

How Remembering Improved My Marriage

By remembering the past successful date – it made me want to relive the date – or experience something similar with my beautiful wife™ again. I also realized that there were so many loving feelings and actions that went into the date – it helped me realize again how much she loves me and the effort she puts into our relationship.
It’s easy to look back and think about negatives and arguments, but what about recalling some of your best memories together?

Visualize Past Success

This post was inspired by reading Tim Sanders’ blog. He mentioned this concept in his post about a speaking engagement he had coming up.
He brought up a great book by Maxwell Maltz, called Psycho-Cybernetics (amazon link). Dr. Maltz talks about visualizing past successes. Instead of imagining a successful future event, he advocates taking the time to recall a previous positive event to encourage future positive performance.

Marriage Researcher John Gottman in his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work(amazon) says that …”the best test of whether a couple still has a functioning fondness and admiration system is usually how they view their past….by focusing on your past, you can often detect embers of positive feelings.”
Great Dates?
So lets take a minute…What past great experience do you remember with your mate – Date or otherwise…that can help stir up positive rememberances…AND help inspire future connection?
Leave a comment. I love a good story!


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